Monday 5 September 2011

The Door Swung Open...

It's time for the first challenge in Rachael Harrie's platform building campaign!


Write a short story/flash fiction story in 200 words or less, excluding the title. It can be in any format, including a poem. Begin the story with the words, “The door swung open” These four words will be included in the word count.

If you want to give yourself an added challenge (optional), use the same beginning words and end with the words: "the door swung shut." (also included in the word count)

For those who want an even greater challenge, make your story 200 words EXACTLY!




The door swung open, and she could see nothing but darkness. Not ordinary darkness, the type that came with the absence of sunlight. This darkness was thick, cloying. As she walked the doorway she became coated with it. Thick and gloopy, it clung to her hair, her clothes and the bare skin of her arms.

She slid a foot out with trepidation. Every fibre of her being was urging her to stop, too go back. There was no way that a simple promise could lead her to so much danger, was there?

But she had promised. No one had forced her to give her word. She had even been given a way out. But a promise made in the cold light of day was easy to give. Carrying it out was another story.

There were steps made of cold stone beneath her feet. A fumble to her side revealed a handrail. Each step brought her further away from safety. Each step made her question her judgement.

Then she heard a movement behind her. A breath. The door swung shut.

43 comments:

  1. Very mysterious. I want to know more!

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  2. Hey! I'm a new follower. I like the mysteriousness you set here, really does make you want to know what's going to happen next.

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  3. sounds like the beginning of a horror flick!
    (or the end =)

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  4. Oh, this is fabulous. Very intense. I like the 3rd paragraph about "the cold light of day" and how it's easier to make a promise than keep one. The end rocks too! YES! Fabulous job!

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  5. Love the build-up in so few words. Great job!

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  6. Nice! Especially love: "Thick and gloopy, it clung to her hair" :)

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  8. Liked your tension and suspense. Very well written.

    Patrica T.

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  9. I love the mystery in this, Christine. Nice.

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  10. I love your description of the darkness and the way it stuck to her. And also the bit about the promise, giving us a glimpse into the character's personality. Nicely done. :)

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  11. Very creepy! I love to be scared :-)

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  12. Oooh, chilling! Love the way you conveyed the character's anxiety so perfectly. Nicely done!

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  13. I'm wondering what the promise was? To whom it was made? Why it was given? I liked the idea of her keeping her word when it was obviously so terrifying to do so. ~ Nadja

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  14. Good and scary! I'm loving reading all of these. Mine is just above yours at #72

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  15. Oh this is so good! I love the idea of the promise. Fantastic!

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  16. Eek. I have chills! great piece of short short!
    Lxxx

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  17. Great tension & suspense ... well done ! You had me on the edge of my seat !
    You can read my entry at no.#59

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  18. Ah! Your ending is jump-worthy! Awesome setting, dark, yet descriptive. Great job, Christine! :)

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  19. Christine, new follower and campainger here, enjoying every description in this short. I have so many questions, mostly because I'm a fraid of the dark. Great job!

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  20. "But a promise made in the cold light of day was easy to give. Carrying it out was another story." I am DYING to know what promise she made!

    Great piece!

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  21. So intriguing. You did a great job with the suspense here!

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  22. Very creepy and suspenseful! LOVE IT!!! Great job! I wish you had written more!
    (I'm entry #236)

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  23. Creepy! I'm sleeping with the lights on tonight=) AND... I've given you a blog award! Stop by and claim it=)

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  24. oooh! I wonder what the promise was!

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  25. I love the description of the darkness!

    Great flash fiction. :)

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  26. that is nice and creepy. well done

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  27. oh, I want to know more. Nice work.

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  28. Very mysterious, very descriptive, I think there is more than meets the eye here.... lol.

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  29. I'm dying to know what promise she made! Great job on keeping us wondering.

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  30. That darkness in the opening really got to me in a kind of bothered I'm not turning the lights off for a long time sort of way. Sucess if that's what you were going for!

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  31. Spooky, and very well done. Great job!

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  32. Great piece Christine! I want to know what happens next!!!
    I'm Laura, in your campaign group. Great to meet you!

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  33. Great cliffhanger! What will happen next?

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  34. Great job! Mysterious, descriptive and left me wanting to read more.

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  35. Mystery...I loved it!!

    http://www.doreenmcgettigan.com

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  36. Your blog is lovely! And any friend of Charissa The Wonderful is a friend of mine! I'm a new follower! Follow back? http://thewriteoneval.blogspot.com
    Happy Monday!!! ~Valerie.

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  37. I loved this! A great opening to a longer story - full of danger, mystery and intrigue. This has to be my favourite entry for this challenge - just sorry that I have only discovered it now when it is too late to vote!
    JoAnna (Helen Clancy)

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